FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE: April 12, 2001, 10:05 p.m. Barnes Place Announces Mortarboard Smorgasbord BARNES PLACE, ATLANTA, GA--The Social Secretary announced today the next Barnes Place Blowout, "Mortarboard Smorgasbord" to take place on Saturday, May 12 at 8:05 p.m. While Mortarboard Smorgasbord promises to be an evening of jubilation focused on the completion of Co-Director Anthony Dornacher's Bachelor's Degree, by coincidence it is also the two-year anniversary of Massacre at Flamingo Grove. "While we anticipate fun will be had by all," said Co-Director Timothy State, "We should not forget the pain and suffering of the past." State is referring to the tragedy which found 20 percent of the flock crushed to their death by an inflatable chair flung by tornado-force winds. Last year's spring festival, themed "Flamingo Rising", celebrated the cycle of life and marked the hardship the plastic lawn ornament has had to endure. The completion of Dornacher's degree has not been without hardship. Dornacher has had to dedicate all of his free time towards his studies. As a result, State, who oversees ambiance and entertainment at Barnes Place, has been forced to increase his Campbell's Soup Casserole repertoire from two to three. It's fitting the flock of flamingos who call Flamingo Grove home have grown to a robust population of 17. Seventeen is the number of years Dornacher has been working towards his degree. Heavy hors d'vores will be served at the event, and non-alcoholic beverages and mixers will be provided. Guests are asked to bring the beverage of their choice. --END--