Houseboys on Parade Barnes Place Mid-Summer Festival Saturday, August 7 8:05 p.m.

Okay, so the Houseboy is pissed. He came back from the Ozarks and it seems someone has lifted his leather whip from his bucket of cleaning supplies in the kitchen. Houseboys on Parade was a flawless evening, with the exception of a stolen whip. For the first time at Barnes Place the event spilled onto the front lawn, where over 45 houseboys mingled to a disco beat. The distraction of the disco lights apparently was no interest to someone with a whip fetish. "Normally," said Timothy State, director of ambiance and entertainment, "we have a guest or two leave behind a dish. But to have a whip stolen, that's unprecedented." If you got home and discovered a whip in your clutch, kindly return it to Barnes Place; no questions asked. Or if you know any information regarding the whip, kindly e-mail us at whip.it@barnesplace.com. Houseboy whip returned. The whip reported missing from the Houseboy's bucket of cleaning supplies at Saturday's Barnes Place Blowout, "Houseboys on Parade" has been returned to the proper owner. After a special e-mail hotline was set up at whip.it@barnesplace.com, tips started flowing in immediately. Your tips lead a team of crack investigators to a guest-participant's behind, only to discover that he had been sitting upon the whip unknowingly. Mark, of Atlanta, Georgia, reported: "It was in the kitchen in a bucket of cleaning supplies... I recall seeing someone rifling through [the bucket] and pulled out the whip. I left the room at that point and did not see him leave with it. I also have no clue as to the likeness of the individual, I guess I was not paying attention that closely. I guess I assumed that he was just being erotic with the thing. Sorry. I know this does not help much. Tony, I think [was] in the kitchen at that time as well, but, I could not be for certain." Investigators moved from the kitchen to other parts of the house. Nelson, of Atlanta, Georgia, and the lighting technician for the event, sent this tip in: "I saw the whip in the hands of the young lady accompanying John, the Tennesseean. This was approximately 10:30 p.m." After interviewing the capable hosts, who sat stunned in the Sashay Ballroom at 3 a.m. Sunday morning, investigators decided to focus on the Porch at Flamingo Grove and the surrounding area. Kristin, also of Atlanta, confirmed their suspicions: "I'm terribly sorry to hear that the whip [has been] stolen. I had it in my possession around 11:10 p.m. - Brett thought I should hold on to it in case any houseboys needed to be whipped into shape. Upon my departure at 11:15 p.m., I left it on the front porch near the steps. Maybe someone can piece together the puzzle from that time." Investigators were closing in, and the following tip from Todd, of Outside the Perimeter, focused the final search: "Ahem...someone was sitting on it. This person wishes to remain anonymous for obvious reasons of complete embarrassment about having a rather large whip in a 'nether region' and not realizing it was there." The crack investigators search the porch thoroughly, discovering it, along with three discarded cocktails, late in the day on Monday, August 11. "We are so thrilled the whip has been found and returned to it's rightful owner," said Director of Ambiance and Entertainment Timothy State. "After such a grand event and this entire investigation," said Director of Catering and Guest Relations Anthony Dornacher, "We're absolutely whipped."