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Rule Out Factors for Dating

It’s taken a summer of dating, but my friend Cindy and I have compiled a list of rule out factors to consider when dating any guys. Any one of these, if true, is reason enough to rule out a potential boyfriend.

1. Wants you to move in, or you move in within the first 12 months. If it’s meant to be, it’s meant to be; it doesn’t need to unfold right away. The gift to ourselves is to take our time and let things unfold in a fashion where we can drink in every detail.
2. The Adore Factor is out of balance. He must adore you as much as you adore him. The flirty texts, the random e-mails, the phone messages of thoughtful sentiment must go both ways, and be filled with equal passion.
3. He fails to deliver. If he flirts with you shamelessly on end, but then says, “I can’t be intimate with you, but I hope we can be friends” then cut him loose. Friends don’t flirt shamelessly, and he’s got no sense of appropriate boundaries.
4. He is only partially available. No scraps; he must be wholely available. The “I love yous” and “You’re my soul mate,” and “I knew instantly that you were the one I’ve been waiting for all my life,” must come when he’s sober, not just when he’s drunk. This is a clear sign that he’s at war with his emotions, so that you don’t get caught in the battle.
5. Has bad punctuation and lazy spelling in text and e-mail. “U wanna hang 2nite?” Seriously, is he a 16-year-old girl? “going out” Is that a question or a statement? If you can’t diagram a sentence to understand what he means, it will only lead to disaster.
6. Suggests going to a bar as a first date. Cliché. If he can’t come up with something more creative, then it’s not with your time.
7. Needs work in the art of conversation. He must be a good conversationalist and an equally good listener. If he’s no good at talking about himself and his life, then no go. And if he’s no good at asking you about your life, well, that’s a no go, as well. He must be just as inquisitive about you as you are about him.
9. Doesn’t have a condom. If in the heat of passion at his place, you say, “Do you have a condom?” And he replies, “No.” Ask, “Did you just run out last night?” How he answers that question will reveal so much. Hope he just finished burning through the family pack, and didn’t have time to replenish, because if it’s been months, either he’s a rusty lover, or he’s not being honest. Seriously, what kind of responsible boy doesn’t have a condom? Is he not taking care of himself and others?
10. Needs practice at kissing. There is no time for amatuers. Word.

What are your rule-out factors?